And then You disappeared

I thought we were friends
I thought I could trust you
I thought you understood me
I thought u knew me
I thought you heard me
I thought you saw me for me
And then you touched me
Then you kissed me
Then you held me close
Then you lay in my arms
Lay in between my legs
Then you told me I was sexy
Then you told me I could be yours..
If only for a moment in time..
And then you had me..
Tasted me.. Devoured me..
Going so deep I didn’t know where you ended or where I began..
And once you had all of me..
You said nothing would change..

And then you disappeared..

Bring Back The Light..

dark

I knew light…
Danced around the light…
Rejoiced in the radiance…
Basked under it’s luminasity…
Until you came around…
And stole my light away…
Consumed it right from beneath me…
Leaving only a shardowy gloom…
Bathing me in your darkness…

I Want To Live…

I’m so sick and tired..

Sick and tired of existing…
I want to live..
Not just exist..
Drifting in and out of days..
Doing whats expected of me..
School, University, Work, Marriage, Kids..
Until one day I finally die..
I feel drained, hollow, devoid of meaning..
I walk and travel the long road..
I fly, swim, drive, paddle..
Searching, aching for a path to take..
Searching for a purpose..
Searching for happiness..Not just contentment..
I want to run far from home and get lost in the wilderness..
I want to jump into the darkness and face the demons..
I want to dive into the ocean and discover the unimaginable..
I want to lose myself in life.. get drunk off her tits..
I want to feel alive..
I mean really live… Not just exist..
Image

Toxic Angst..

You are a stiff drug for me..
Toxic and acidic to my heart

Devouring me up from the inside out..
I’m in a constant fog..
Trying but failing desperately to remember my life before you..
You blind me from seeing the rest of the world..
Fueling my frantic need for you..
My dependency of you is an ache..
An ache which morphs into a physical pain..
When i’m away from you I can not bare it..
You open my rib cage and leave my soul exposed..
My core drilled and etched away..
You are my needle, my anxiety, my morphine..
You unnaturally enjoys my suffering..
Watching me sadistically and giving me a wicked smile..
Your distance brings about a state of confusion, perplexity, mystery..
A feeling of deep and utter loss..
Feelings of bereavement bring about withdrawal symptoms..
And I have no way of preventing this angst.. 

gal