More and more my head rules my life.. I stay alive in my own head.. Thinking…Wondering… Stressing Imagining..Fantasizing.. Shutting myself out from the world.. The disappointment around me.. The desolation of being me.. The pain of reality..
More and more I live in my own head.. My happy place.. My solace of peace.. Reality and fantasy merging into one.. More and more I vanish Evaporating into nothingness.. And more and more I do not want to come back..
Kiss my lips like I’m the air you need.. Taste my body like its the only thing that has ever and will ever fill you.. Hold me like my body is your anchor… Set my body on fire… Forget about the ache in your heart.. Forget about making love.. Forget about connecting with my lonely soul… Make my body come alive..
Make me moan..
Make me scream your name..
Make me shiver in lust..
Make me beg for more..
Make me forget about the rest of the world…
Make me forget about the ache deep within..
Make me forget about me..
Make me forget about him..
And I will make you forget about her.. Forget about my heart…My soul..My head… Forget about loving me.. Forget about making me yours.. Forget about a life time together.. Let us just think about this moment in time.. As long as you set my body on fire..
My soul speaks to you…
Your ego speaks to me..
You look into my eyes and you see unfathomable love..
I look into your eyes and all I see is cold lust…
You search my heart and all you find is longing..
I search your heart and all I find is emptiness…
You touch my body and you want to do like you did a hundred before me..
I touch your body and I want yours to be the only body I touch..
You need someone there to make you feel good about yourself..
I need someone there to love and complete me…
You open your mouth and all that flows out is vanity and lies..
I open my mouth and all that flows out is endless honesty..
You need to leave but you won’t because you are addicted to the sex…
I need to leave but I won’t because I am addicted to the thought of you loving me..
My lips speak to you and all you want to do is have a taste…
Your lips speak and all I want to do is be your girl for eternity…
I speak to you and all that comes out is question after question..
You speak to me and not a single answer makes an appearance..
I cant get enough of your sweet meaningless words…
You cant get enough of my soft touch and calming voice..
You spin your web of lies and trap me in..
I spin my web of naivety and hope and try to trap you…
We are forever stuck in a place that neither of us can escape…
I have a confession .. Anywhere we are… Anytime.. I want to be where ever you are I want to see whatever you see.. To feel Everything you feel.. To swim in your happiness.. To drown in your sadness and misery.. To be part of every adventure.. Every moment.. To be a part of you.. To live in your soul…. To walk around your heart.. I want to know how to love you… How to make you smile.. How to make you cry.. How to make you lose your mind.. How to drive you mad with passion.. How to bring out the beast in you… How to make desire pour out of you.. And pour onto me.. How to make you violent.. I want to know every.. Because I am trapped.. Trapped within myself when you cross my mind..
A slave to a master..
I endure only pain.. Committed to a life of loneliness and despair.. Just a body with an empty soul..
Sometimes… Sometimes I wish I could be your shadow.. To trail behind you like a lost soul trying to catch on to its body.. Just so that I can get a chance….. A fruitless, mindless chance… To simply exist within the same space as you..
Sometimes I feel.
I don’t mean to..
Hell, most times I try not to..
But I can not help it..
When you are near me I feel..
Because you make my world spin a little faster..
Make my dreams seem a little closer..
And then I feel everything..
I feel you deep inside me…
I wish for you to take me..
To make me yours..
Slowly..All day… How ever you want..
But you don’t see me..
Don’t even know I exist..
And it hurts..
It cuts me deep..
Burns like a furnace..
Like you are flaying the skin off my bones..
But my heart doesn’t listen..
When you are around me…
I fall apart…
I can barely breathe…
I still feel too much..
There is a fire burning within my soul
Flamming, burning, destroying
Burning only for your
For your appreciation
For your acceptance
For your caress
I am starved for your look
There is a fire incinerating my insides
Utter desperation coats my heart
I yearn for you to put out the fire
But all you do is give me that bored smirk
As you throw gasoline into the fire