Swallow Me Whole…

I feel a darkness..
A darkness within..
Surrounding me..
Like dark poisonous vines curving around a dying tree..
Pain..
Utter and ultimate misery..
Twirls around my slow beating heart..
Swallowing me whole..
Devouring my inner being..

To be…Or Not To Be..

My life..
My love..
My only one..
Or so i thought..
You, my dream,my fantasy..
No longer my reality..
My source of light,of joy, of love, of all things wonderful..
Now my cause for pain, for heartache, for pure torture..
You, who captured my soul, my heart in beautiful rose nets..
Now leaves me captured in torment, in black vines of death..
With no hope, no faith of survival..
I crave for your adoration, your touch, your voice..
Because you are mine no more..
I long for your memories to leave me..
Night in and day out your face haunts my existence..

He Breathes..

He breathes..

Taking in the cool night breeze..

Occasionally  giving me a glance..

Distant, unattached, uninvolved..

Distracted by the pretty damsels..

Dancing around..

Carefree in their flimsy summer dresses..

He breathes..

Occasionally drizzling me with attention..

Spraying me with affection..

Continuously ignoring my longing..

He drinks me up and sucks me dry..

Then spits me out and stomps on me..

Before taking his leave..

All that’s left is a whisper of me..

Dislodged..

Frayed..

Girl In The Mirror

Look into my eyes

Do you see what i see

Do you see the torment

Your glimpse is so hypnotic I ache for you

Felling a dark twinge deep inside me

Completely mystified I turn away

Not being courageous enough to gaze into those cold eyes

Unbearably soul less, they suck me in

Filling me wholly and utterly with agony

Becoming one with those eyes i no longer exist

No longer know the difference

Are you me..

 Am I you….

Am I hallucinating….

Will I ever know…

Battle Of The Souls….

 

The night is dark, as terrifying demons lie in wait

I hold my armor up and prepare for battle 

I put my soul at risk to destroy the monsters running in the shadows

Combat goes on for eternity under the gloomy moon

Limbs are torn and bones are crushed

Eyes glaring like empty holes on their faces

Until daylight comes and they disappear into nothingness like they never where

Leaving only whispers and veils of the war before

 

Forbidden Love..Part 3

He was driving like a maniac, swerving and almost going head first onto an oncoming truck. For the past few months his wife had been unnaturally jolly. Her whole behavior has been different, uplifted. She has been caring more about her looks, clothes and even started working out. Caring more about him and trying her best to make sure things between them are great.

At first he thought he must be doing something right and finally making her happy, but then he realized it had nothing to do with him, he noticed small changes, new sexy underwear, hushed whispers on the phone, spending more time outside the house with her friends and the utter lack of passion and heat in their love making.

Ahmed had fully concluded that his wife was having an affair. That’s when he came up with a plan to catch her in the act and confirm his suspicions. He told her he was going on a business trip for the week and hired a private investigator to let him know when his wife meets her lover, then went to hide out at a hotel. Now as he hurried back to his house he wished he had never gotten the call. He kept replaying the words over and over in his head.

“Your suspicions where right and they are in your house this very minute” the private investigator said over the phone.

Ahmed did not even wait to hear the rest of the findings and was out of the door in a heartbeat. As he was entering his driveway his heart was beating so hard he thought it would pop out from his chest. As he slowly and quietly opened the living room, he still wished the P.I was wrong, but as he neared the stairs he heard the sounds. He heard her moaning and screaming and pictured her quivering with pleasure as a man caressed her soft, plum body, as he ravished and kissed her.

He walked slowly up the stairs, the sounds getting louder as he got closer to the bedroom door, the sounds made his skin crawl, he felt the hair on his back stand.

“Where is he?” He yelled furiously as he slammed the bedroom door open.

“Oh my god Ahmed! What are you doing here?!”  Yara shrieked in disbelieve and shame.

“Where is the bastard you are fucking?” he roared through the bedroom, ripping the sheets from his wife’s hands as she tried to cover herself up in futility.  He stomped through the room looking under the bed, in the bathroom, out of the window, behind the curtains and as he jerked open the closet door his emotions went into turmoil from pain, to fury and finally confusion.

“Anaise?!” He stared at her feeling like he had just been kicked in the gut..

To be continued with the final part… 🙂

Love Please Save Me..

You turned me over love

You are a path to the heart that knows it own way

You dazzle me with your bright shinning star

And leave your prints on me

You know not your own depth until the hour of separation

You Leave me low and torn

You gut me open with your big claws

You drive me to the ends of the world

Then leave me stranded with no way to get back

Meeting you in my dreams is only torture

Because then i awake reaching for you to no avail

Love why do you wound me so bad?

Me Against The Light….

I stand in the darkness perplexed

Trying to find the switch to no avail

Have been asleep for days

Yet the sun does not appear

Round and round i go searching for a way out

Shadows linger waiting for my last breath

I hear sounds of freedom and radiance flowing from afar

Just as I see a ray of hope

Gloom engulfs me once more

Like a flower i wilt to my inevitable demise

Abyss….

I live in padlocked terror

Is it today is it tomorrow

Is it the day that’s going to be my sorrow

Am i being punished for being the creature that i am

Hard times come and drag me down

Down into the deepest scum filled gulf

In a state of abyss here i slouch

slain in my journey to survival

My soul tumbles into the deep void

Waiting for the ogres and trolls to come 

To come and gather my soulless bag of severed carcass

Walls Of Destruction

The walls i build around me are as hard as steel

Put around me to protect me

But instead they bring me pain

Because with them so high i have nothing to gain

I keep you at a distance so you see only the facade

So that my troubled, misery filled life does not infect you.

Pushing you away would be the best protection

Because i don’t want to strengthen the connection

I am terrified of my severe feelings for you

They have a hold on to me which makes me blue

My life always seem to lead to pain

Being with me you have nothing to gain

No matter how hard I try to disappear

 I never seem to be in the clear

I want to live my life with no terror

Terrified that someone will walk up to me and hurt me

Terrified that someone will leave me

Terrified that nothing will never workout for me

Terrified that i will end up alone

Because all i bring to your life is pain

I just want to be normal and bring joy to you..