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She gives him all her being
He takes and gives nothing
She gives him more

My First Heart Break

They say a mother’s love is all encompassing
A mother’s love is power
A mother’s love gives sustenance
A mother’s love heals wounds
A mother’s love embraces the heart and soul

She birthed me
She raised me
She fed me
She loved me
But never as much as she did my kin

She birthed her before me
She put her on a pedestal
She nourished her
Mind body and soul
She adored her
More than she ever did me

They say a mother’s love is all encompassing
But my mother’s love is fickle and conditional


A mother’s love gives power
But my mother’s love makes me weak and frail


A mother’s love gives sustenance
But my mother’s love leaves me yearning and famished


A mother’s love heals all wounds
But my mother’s love breaks me and creates deep gashes


A mother’s love embraces your heart and soul
But my mother’s love shatters my heart and cracks open my soul



Image from an unknown artist

Reality…

Sometimes I think i’m fine..
I think my world is completely normal..
Content even.. 
That I might even be happy one day..
But then reality crashes over me..
And i realize the place where my heart used to reside is empty..
All that is left is a dark void..

Number one….

One day..
One far away day..
one lonely day..
Just one day…
I will finally be someone’s number one..
It might not be today..
It might not be  tomorrow..
Might not even be in the next ten years..
But I have to believe…
I have to hope and pray..
That one day..
Someone will love me enough..
Need me enough…
Adore me enough..
To render me their number one..
loveme

My Birthday In Nigh!

Time..Flows swiftly..
Sometimes slowly..
Passing me by..
Stringing me along..
pushing me through the gates..
Is it a lowly day..
Is it a decade..
My soul feels awfully glum..
Am i alone..
For i feel deserted, secluded, desolate..
Oh how i have grown to loathe this day..
This epoch that i was born on..
birthday

My birthday is tomorrow and i’m a continent away from my familia, so i’m kind of feel extra lonely this year..

Girl In The Mirror

Look into my eyes
Do you see what i see
Do you see the torment
Your glimpse is so hypnotic I ache for you
Felling a dark twinge deep inside me
Completely mystified I turn away
Not being courageous enough to gaze into those cold eyes
Unbearably soul less, they suck me in
Filling me wholly and utterly with agony
Becoming one with those eyes i no longer exist
No longer know the difference
Are you me..
 Am I you….
Am I hallucinating….
Will I ever know…

Incurable Romantic

As you lie here on my arms

Sleeping like an angle
Enjoying the rocking and rhythm of my body
I question what is on your pure mind
So simple and untouched by humanity and the world
Your cries so painful and devastating
Your laughter so jovial and carefree
ooh my child.. how i wish i could keep it so
Protect you from all the peril of this planet
I will forever hold you in a tight embrace
And i love you with senseless passion
Because you are my reason for waking up in the morning, my gift, my light, my life
Because of you i am an incurable romantic…….

A Love Like No Other

In my eyes you are perfection

You are my one and forever joy

You are the light that shines through my dark days

You are the one i can never disappoint

You are the one who sees beauty in me even when the rest of the world, including me doesn’t

I loved you yesterday

I love you today

And i’ll love you for eternity and a day…

Happy Mother’s day…

Paranoia….

Swallows me whole and leaves me fetal 

Paranoia

Twirls me up in a tornado of emotions
Paranoia
Crawls through my throat and rips my insides inside out
Paranoia
Infects me with queasiness and tears me apart
Paranoia
Sets me on a wild goose chase searching for my soul
Paranoia
Makes me want to cleave my eyes out because i dont want to witness my demise
Paranoia
Is it all in my mind or does the horror exist??